Language is a wonderful thing, Though sometimes we don’t see the power it gives us. Instead we let others speak through us as if their voice has more power then or voices ever could. Take me for example. I mumble a lot of the things I say and I think it’s because of my Past. I never talked to a lot of people in my old school and instead had people talk for me.  This made me not truly feel that there was no power in my words. Today though I have much more confidence when I speak now, but sometimes the past comes back and I start mumbling again.

One big example would be in my old school. It was the advvage schools with adverage students, but some were more louder than others. Not even volume wise, but also some students would have a lot of people listen when they spoke and others would have barely any. I was one of the quiet ones and because of that no one would really listened to. So when everyone would start talking when students were trying to focus I could say “Quiet!” and no one would listen, probably not even hear me, but as soon as one of the louder students would talk everyone would remain quiet. This would make me feel that my words had no power. As if the only way to get my voice or opinion out was to quietly say it to whoever i was sitting with hopeing they would hear what I said and agree with it. Then my voice would get out there.

This began to change though as years went on though. I started to hear the confidence in my voice the more I heard people saying rediculous things. I decided to almost force my voice forward to prove to myself that my voice has meaning. After I was finished my old school I thought that now with High School I’m going to have to prove that my voice has power all over  again and this time it will be harder to prove myself.  Fortunately when I got to SLA I couldn’t have been anymore wrong.

My very first class at SLA was African-American history. I was nervous because in Advisory I had not talked much and I was worried that what happen in my old school would happen again. The worst case scenario was happening as the first assignment given was a group based one. I began to worry, but as soon as the assignment was giving people were looking at everyone for ideas. Including from me.  This began a revalation I had where I realized that I had power in my words and that I spent years not believing in them. I could say what I wanted and people would listen.  I was the voice for my group discussing the assignment to the other students and showing that I stand by my and my groups words. I learned that when you speak others will listen, but only if you stand by what you are saying and show your language through it.

In the story Aria the story says “the speech of people in public often be loud and booming.” After that situation in school.  I realized that this is what I wanted. To be able to speak to anyone withh confidence that matched my words.   This quote discusses what everyone should look forward to in life. Being able to say what ever you want to say so that not only will people want to listen, but also process your personality through that language.

Now after my first year at SLA I no longer have fear for my words.  I have found my language and how it matches my personality. I can’t say the same about others though. There are others who feel that their language is suppresed by others and don’t  which to say their words. Instead they speak their language through others hoping that the power of the others person’s voice will help them speak their mind. The only real ways words have power is when you say them yourself. That’s when you show what it is you stand for and why you are speaking. Language is like a persons Personality where for everyone it’s different and there isn’t a set rule for what language truly is. To have someone talk through you ruins your words because you are not saying them with the power of their own language. This is why before you can stand for anything you have to stand by your language.  

“I would rather be anywhere else right now…” I say. “I don’t have the energy to workout, I just want to go to bed.” “Today’s workout is 4 x 2500m! Go stretch and do your core workout and then hop on an erg and start your pieces.” My coach explains to the entire team.

I look around the room and see everyone’s smile slowly start to fade.

“Wow Nicole, are you trying to kill us?” I say jokingly to my coach.

“Oh man…This is gonna be a long day, I ain’t ready foh dis” I hear someone say across the room and everyone nods in agreement. We know the sooner we start the sooner it will be over so we quickly get to work.

The workout is finally over and my teammates and I are sitting on our ergs breathing heavily, legs shaking and sweat all over.

“OMG Why do we row? What is wrong wit us? Ugh ma body hurts! I hear these statements coming from all over the room. 

I had just found out that my grandmother had cancer on Christmas Eve, so my family and I went to visit her. She was so frail and weak. It was like she was a completely different person than what I had remembered. Even though she was sick, she still greeted us with a warm smile and hug. I stayed in her living room watching my cousin play games on the Wii. My uncle walked into the living room and told us to eat pizza. After eating the pizza, we were getting ready to leave.

My grandmother was sitting on the sofa with my mom right beside her. Her face was full of exhaustion and her head was laying back on the sofa. She grabbed my hand and started speaking to me in Chinese. I was shocked because I have forgotten all of it. I was not answering her because I just could not.

I couldn’t do anything but stare at my grandmother. I felt like there was an inner battle with myself. I wanted to speak to her so bad but I could not speak. In this moment, I felt like if I was to speak Cambodian, which she could also understand, I would just sound weird and she would not be able to understand me anyway. In my mind, there were things that I wanted to say to her but my mouth stayed shut. I wasn’t comfortable speaking Cambodian nor did I understand what she was saying to me in Chinese. My grandmother continued to ask me questions in Chinese and all I could do is nod my head without knowing what was happening.

It is just another school morning for my family and I. It is about 7 o'clock in the morning and I am sitting quietly on the black couch with a red blanket wrapped around me in the living room. The room is dark and the only light it gets is from the bright light in the kitchen.  

Language is something that plays a big part in everyone lives and can often be an advantage or disadvantage to people. Some people thinks that knowing more than one language helps us express ourselves more but others may disagree and say that it does not help but actually puts a restriction on us. People should used language as an advantage because if we are able to know a language clearly, it would not come as a disadvantage.

Coming from a family that speaks two different language and living in an environment that speaks another language, I had a hard time communicating with different people. Since I was not able to keep up with three languages, I began to forget the ones from my family and only using English because it was the one that I used the most. When I was not able to talk to my grandmother, I realized that if you are bilingual, then you should use it to your advantage by not forgetting it. There are people that pay to learn what you can get from your family, unlike me, I forgot Chinese completely and this caused me to not be able to speak to half of my family.

In the story, “Tongue-Tied” by Maxine Hong Kingston, the main character got her tongue cut off so that she would not be tied to just one language and so that it could be free. Her mother stated, “I cut it so that you would not be tongue tied....”(pg. 164). Her mother felt like cutting off her daughter’s tongue would be the best choice for the daughter because then she would be able to speak multiple languages and not tied all around one. Also the girl stated, “I enjoyed the silence...”(pg. 164). She enjoyed staying silent and I think this is because she does not know how to control language and turn it into an advantage. She speaks two different languages but she prefers not to speak often rather than me because I rather just speak one.

People should know that language is a privilege and if they do not want it to be a disadvantage in their life, then they should embrace it so that it becomes an advantage instead. Language gives us the power to communicate with other people and that is an important aspect in life but it also creates a net, allowing only the little things we want to say through but not the bigger things. In order for us to break this net, we have to be willing to learn more about language. It is like trying to find a solution to a problem, we cannot find the solution until we learn about the problem.

There are many ways in which we represent the different things that were are influenced to how they affect us in every aspect of life, no matter how slight that change may be. This can be any number of things. The people that are around, the places they see and are present in, what they see on tv and the people they are introduced to. Those effects can be observed and narrowed down to the smallest detail. Sometimes, that detail can be as miniscule as the way a person talks around different people and groups. This becomes evident and can become noticeable as more and more people get used to how you talk to them and it can come as a surprise to them if they hear how you talk to other people that you don’t use the same tone of voice and or speech with when you talk to them as opposed to when you talk to that person. Unfamiliarity can be a strange thing. For instance, when you’re meeting someone new, it is always a quick decision on how you will speak to that person. Whether or not you will use your normal voice or something to make you sound more professional or mature. The choices are endless and everyone’s are different. It all boils down to first impressions and creating a persona for yourself.

I have discovered that through time, and through observing by listening, anyone can pick up on the manner with which one person talks to another. Even though at times it may not be apparent, the code switching is still present because everybody does it, no matter how slight it may be. The first time that I started to listen to people when they talk, I didn’t immediately think of it as anything out of the ordinary, but it was peculiar to me how that person’s voice had sounded, in comparison to how it sounded when they talked to me. The first time that I really deeply observed the trait that everyone develops at some point early in their life is when I had involuntarily done it when I was talking to my friends one day. It was about three years ago. I was holding just a normal conversation with my friend, Dave at our grade school. Now, before I get into how I analyzed our conversation, I want to preface my statement with saying that Dave was generally known as a tougher character, one that could throw a pretty hard punch, and take one, too. It was early in the school year, about November or December. Me and a my friend were sitting down in the cafeteria, talking about god knows what. Dave had gotten some of the less than appetizing food offered by the school for those who didn’t bring a lunch from home. Which, when I think about it now, was not worth the money paid for it. He sat down at our table, inhabited only by me and another person. I vaguely remember one of us cracking a joke about something and then I watched Dave look at his “lunch” and grimace with disgust. He then cursed and muttered something under his breathe. We both began to talk about our days and the oddities that tended to occur at our school. We shared laughs here and there and by the end of lunch, I had noticed something about my voice. It had gotten deeper, slightly, and I spoke much more loosely, not caring much for proper grammar or fluid pronunciation. I was trying to sound... tough, I guess is what I would call it then. In comparison to current day, I now call it “making a first impression.” The reason I did this was to... well, fit in. I felt it necessary to do so because I wanted to have that sense of toughness. Now, when I compare that to how I talk to my dad, it’s a whole other story. The words I speak are much softer and completely articulate when I talk to my father. Back to the story. The way I spoke to my friend those years ago, is generally how I’ll speak to strangers when asked a question or just when having a conversation with a store clerk. I always have tried to keep this demeanor and appearance of a tougher person.

The reason that it’s involuntary is because when you become so adept to talking certain ways to different people, it becomes second-nature to us, a passing thought. Not at that specific moment, though. I stopped myself, after I had finished my thought. I noticed that I just spoke in a different tone of voice to my friends... almost out of nowhere. It seemed completely new to me, even though I had been doing it so long - it just never occurred to me because I was unconsciously doing it.